Apr 012010
 

I have had a recurring dream the last few days or so. I am at a strange airport with some friends (who I don’t know) waiting for my layover which I know is at least 6 and a half hours. Everyone decides to go their separate way and I run into a friend, (who was not a part of the original group) Jewel. It was weird running into her because she didn’t know I was going to be there (I think) and she had her own agenda and was on a long layover too. (maybe overnight or weather related or because that is how airlines like to fuck us). Anyway we are both surprised to see each other and hug and decide to hang out. We end up somewhere on those airport chairs and are resting. I am slouching on the chair and she is resting her head and chest on my shoulder, neck, and chest with her hand on my chest as well. That is all I can remember of it. I remember how nice it was.

I put my self on the scale today and I have lost nine pounds since the end of Jan. I am glad I am still on the losing track, however I was hoping to lose a bit more by now. I am still doing pretty good on everything. A little slip here and there, but that happens.

My house has felt so empty since Tammy left. I can still see and smell remnants of her being here, and I remember all her girl things (lotions, sprays, soaps) . It definitely makes me realize how lonely I am and how much I am missing out on life and a partner with having someone stay with you a week and then suddenly disappear. We aren’t even dating and there wasn’t sex involved and I am so pathetic over her visiting. I am pathetic. I don’t even know why I allow myself to get this way since I am such a gross specimen of a man. Anyway…

Another thing I can’t stop getting out of my head is how we were treated at Sublime. The hostess was snotty, same with the waitress. And when we went into the retail area of the restaurant (after I had already dropped a bill on dinner) Tammy noticed that they were both looking at us and watching us, then they continued to look and watch when we went to the bar to pay for the things we picked up which I noticed when the bartender was adding up our stuff. I put my displeasure on the Sublime fb page but it has since been removed without any response from them. So that makes things even more bitter in my mouth for them. I guess if I want to eat at an all vegan restaurant again, instead of driving 5 hours I will have to go to DC.

  
Mood : happylonely
Music : Ministry
 Posted by at 8:07 pm