Mar 152016

So today to celebrate pi day I made pie! Blueberry chocolate chip pie to be exact. I haven’t gotten to cut into it yet because I finished it right before work. I was going to just bake it and then post a picture, but I decided to go ahead and make a video even though I did a blueberry chocolate chip cobbler a few months ago.

pi pie

pi pie

Oh, if you didn’t already know, for the last couple of years I have been putting my fat ugly face in front of a video camera and cooking. It was actually something I was going to do when I was still living in Florida (I actually painted my kitchen and everything) but I never did do any actual videos. Well I finally started doing it, to very limited success and audience. I am slowly building an audience on my social medias but I am not really feeling it on the site. About a year ago or so I moved my videos off of youtube, but I am thinking about moving them back just because of the sheer numbers there and more chance to catch eyeballs.

This weekend I have another video I want to make and I need to get Computron back up and running. It has been down for way too long. I have most of what I need to get done done. I have videos to edit. Darn it!

Current Music: The Young Turks
Mood : happycalm
Music : The Young Turks
Mar 122016

Sometimes my job frustrates me to no end. There is a group we support that seems to be the laziest group. They are also very understaffed, they can go home whenever they want, and we end up taking the wrath for that. Today I got a call from someone who called yesterday to have his phone provisioned and the ticket wasn’t even touched today. The group left around noon, and I got to hear the brunt. I am still not happy about it and earlier I was pretty pissed, not only the way that asshole treated me but also because of the ongoing lack of action from the group we support. I also have a funny feeling that even though there was nothing I could do, this is going to end up coming back to me for some reason.

I have a feeling that a rum and coke is in my near future.

I am really concerned with what has happened in this country. The grand canyon divide that has happened. I think it started with Bush jr, but it very well could have started with Reagan. The 24 hour news media has done nothing but fuel this divide for ratings and views. Sensationalism sells but causes discontent and divide. Fox news and their anti obama rhetoric has put jet fuel on top of this ever growing fire, and now we have Trump pouring more gasoline on top. His rallies have gotten increasingly more violent and we have people getting punched, shoved and beaten. He fuels the mob with his words saying shit like he would punch them himself, and in the past we would have taken care of this other ways, and that he would pay people their court costs if they cause violence. People are starting to get tired of it and today was a big counter protest in Chicago. I have a feeling this is going to get bigger and bigger and we are going to start having riots in the streets. I don’t know what is going to happen, but I am more afraid and more wanting to move out of country. If Trump becomes president, this country will be a disaster.

Current Music: The Young Turks
Mood : happyaggravated
Music : The Young Turks
 Posted by at 12:26 am
Mar 112016

My weekends are usually a bust. This weekend was no exception. Tuesday was payday so I spent a lot of it out buying groceries and stuff. I woke up early and was out of the house by 9. I wanted to go to The Earth and have their scramble mountain for breakfast, especially since it was cold and rainy. By the time I got there they were all sold out. So disappointing. I ended up having a couple cliff bars for breakfast. I also wanted to get all my errands done before 1, didn’t get home until like 3. And I pretty much slept the rest of the night and most of the next day. I have a lot I need to do as well, need to clean and get my computer up and going, I also have food I need to make too. I am tired of buying groceries for recipes and having to throw out food because it goes bad.

I really didn’t eat much this weekend either. Not as much as I could have. I don’t think I ate breakfast yesterday either. I had my coffee, but didn’t end up eating anything of substance until later in the day.

So that was my weekend. So exciting! I really need to get my shit together. I have a lot of things I need to do. A lot of things and I am a lazy ass.

Current Music: The Young Turks
Mood : happylazy
Music : The Young Turks
Mar 082016

I have been living in Oklahoma for almost 5 years now. I really need to start considering my living situation and decide where to go next. When I moved to Florida I really didn’t want to come back here, and was conned in coming back. I should have stayed in Florida, I think I would be in a much better much happier place than I am at now. I don’t know if I would have been at the same job in Florida or not because of the work politics, however. I miss my feet in the sand, the beautiful sunsets, the taste, smell, and feel of the salt water on my skin.

I did get to go to Spain a couple of times over the last couple of years, so I haven’t been fully deprived of the beach, and I am working on trying to go back soon. The details I am going to save for another post when I have a lot more time to write down my thoughts, however the time I spent there was for the most part enjoyable, and it made me fall madly deeply in love with Spain. It was my perfect place to be. Mountains, beach, warm weather, warm water, cool old buildings, history, art. It doesn’t snow in the beach area, but it does in the mountains, doesn’t rain much. The big downside is it is a different country and they make it really difficult for people in the US to gain citizenship and get jobs there. So that is a big challenge for me.

I have talked about Florida and talked about Spain. It would be easier to move back to Florida, but to be in Spain, to be so close to all that history and art and beautiful country, would be something that I would love to experience. I wish I had traveled more, lived in Europe when I was younger. I know those what ifs suck, but I really need to change my situation, I am so unhappy here.

Current Music: The Young Turks
Mood : happycontemplative
Music : The Young Turks
Mar 072016

So right now my main computer is down. I bought an all in one cooler for it and despite doing a bunch of research to make sure it would fit, it doesn’t. I spent $100 on it, so it isn’t like I want to return it. The radiator is too small, and the holes don’t’ match up. So I am working on making brackets to attach to the case and to the radiator. Been working on drilling holes and stuff to make it fit. I need to get back up soon. I have videos that I need to edit and other tasks that only it can handle. Hopefully I can get it all back up soon. It has been down for way too long now. I might take pictures of the box later.

There is so much that I want to put down in paper, but I don’t give myself enough time to be able to do so. So much that I need to let out, to see in black and white. I need to start dictating it to my phone and let google do the hard work I guess.

Yesterday I talked about my diet problems. I am trying to get a hold on this. Today I ate my normal breakfast of half a demibaguette toasted with shredded tomato, avocado, olive oil and sea salt. I also had coffee with chocolate soy milk, and a banana Lunch was some dal and potato curry I made myself, I also had 10 peanut butter crackers, A salad with organic sugar free dressing, a lemon lime sparkling water and a coke zero. Once I am done with this pack of coke I need to stop buying it. I know the artificial sweetener is hurting. Breakfast usually doesn’t change much, sometimes I have fruit, but not usually. I used to be really good in eating fruit, I need to get back into eating much more fruit, and nuts as well. That might be another part of my problem.

Current Music: The Young Turks
Mood : happytired
Music : The Young Turks
Mar 052016

I really need to get off of my sugar addiction. I have been trying to lose weight for a couple years now. At my lowest was in 2015 I weighed 199 lbs. When I started I was 235. I am around there again now (I haven’t weighed myself in 2 weeks). I am afraid I might even be more. The sugar has me. I can’t eat just one portion, can’t eat just one cookie. I need to start buying fruit and not sweets when I have those grocery store runs. I want to be 135 again. Why can’t I control my urges? I am fucking way the fuck out of control. I bought 4 boxes of thin mints last week, all gone by The. I will eat a box of ice cream sandwiches, a pint of ice cream, I will eat 3 packages of pop tarts in one day. I have to stop bringing money to work, have to stop this.

I don’t know how much I will write about my diet, but I really need to lose weight and I think it is necessary for me to put it on paper, if I dare call myself out on this shit. That is the problem, denial, guilt, needing to change, but not actually changing. Putting it off, saying I will start tomorrow, next week, no next week, and then it is two months and 10 lbs later.

I have a fitbit and mostly log my foods on myfitnesspal. I need to be a lot more honest in my logging though. I am only hurting myself otherwise.

Current Music:
Mood : happydetermined
Music :
Mar 042016

I need to start journaling again. I have been procrastinating, and have had a lot of thoughts in my head but have been too lazy to put it down. I have a lot to catch you up on, so much it can be really long, so I will probably have to put that down in several posts. I think I will start by trying to remember a dream I had last night / this morning.

I was in my house and I was hearing a lot of noises coming from outside. I looked out and in the East pasture was a bunch of people in a quarter to half circle surrounding a bunch of farm animals like sheep and goats and bulls and there were people mixed in with the animals and it seemed like some kind of disorganized rodeo. I went out to try to kick them out and I was videoing them with my phone. My dad came out of his house around the same time, and in his usual style said he would take care of this. I was standing at the barb wire fence watching and videoing them, making sure I got the faces of what I thought was the main people and the people mixed in with the animals. My dad came back towards me and I noticed he had a bunch of money with him now. I was asking them if they were going to leave and he said not to worry about it, and to go back to the house, I was even more madder now and started yelling at them to leave and that I didn’t want them there. Dad grabbed my arm and pushed me back, and I remember him trying to give me ~$20 in fives and ones, and told me that I needed to erase the videos. I told him that I am not going to erase the video, that is when the dream ended.

I am going to have to try to write more later.

Current Music:
Mood : happycalm
Music :
Jan 222012

Ten years ago today I moved to Florida. I can’t believe it has already been 10 years. When I think back 10 years, I always think that is the 90s. I am getting old. I Still think that moving to Florida was one of the best decisions I had made, even though the reasons why wasn’t.

I really miss St. Pete. I miss the beaches and hte roads and palm trees, and lizards. I miss the warmth, the sea breazes. I miss the natural food stores and my friends I left there. I miss the boats, the water, and everything else.

Not much is going on in Oklahoma land. It has been cold, which has made me lazy and wanting to do nothing but lay next to the heater and bundle up to stay warm. I fucking hate the cold.

I fucking hate the cold.

I fucking hate the cold.

 Posted by at 11:58 pm
Jan 072012

Hmm. It has been a while. A long while. That is what happens when you get lazy and stuff.
On Tuesday I flew down to Dallas and met with an old friend who I met back in 1999 on ICQ. She currently lives in Moraira, Spain and originally from Lima, Peru. I have always wanted to meet her and I finally got to. I want to go out to Spain to spend more time with her. We only had a few hours to talk because she was on a layover to go back home from vacationing with friends and family in Portland. It was way too short of a time, but I am glad after all these years we were finally able to meet face to face.
Before her plane landed I went to TGIfridays to have a fat tire and some lunch and the fat tire was flat and the food was way overcooked. I was very disappointed. I should have complained, but I was too tired to do so. I did fill out their feedback survey thing though.

The office moved us to a new building and so far I am on the fence about the new place. It is nice to get my own desk, but they didn’t’ have monitors or keyboard or mouse for me so they had to dig them up. I also don’t like where the monitors are placed, but there is nothing I can do about that since the keyboard and monitors are stationary. They put them in the middle of the desk and I would prefer them be at the end.

I think dad and I are going down to Texas on the 16th to go get some Fat Tire. I hope so. I might get a couple of cases and drink a 6 pack that night that we get back. I love me some Fat Tire. I might look for some Railyard Ale too, I would love to get some of that as well.

 Posted by at 10:29 pm
Nov 272011

So my gmail account was hacked by someone in Kosovo, I am sorry for my friends who got that email and clicked on the link.
I have since changed my password to something more secure and hopefully it won’t happen again.

So what is the lesson? be sure your password is not based on a dictionary word. Be sure there is a capital, a small, a number and a special symbel, not based on a word, and is at least eight charaters long.

Also if you recieve a message from someone with a link with no real subtext that looks really weird, don’t click on it. Ask before clicking. Ask ask ask.

This last thing has been one of many bad things happening to me in the last week. Lets start out with Wendsday. Wendsday was the bad day of bad days. It started out with me leaving to go get my bills paid and stuff. I couldn’t find my cell phone when I was walking out to the car, so I went back into the house to find it and looked everywhere before I decided to call it. My phone was in my back pocket. Then when I went to go get gas I guess I was in a hurry because when I got in the car to leave, I looked in my right mirror to see if the handle was still in the tank, I didnt’ see it, so I drove off. The handle was in the tank and luckilly there was a quick release on the hose otherwise I would have torn down the pump. Then later on that night I needed to go to Walmart and somewhere between getting out of my car and going back to my car I lost my keys. So I walked back in to look to see if I left them on the shelf check writing thing because I have a tendancy of putting them there when whipping out my wallet. Wasn’t there, one of the workers asked if I had lost my keys and said the supervisor has them, so after waiting a little while for her to not be busy she retrieved them for me.

The next day dad and I was supposed to go eat somewhere for thanksgiving and when I went out to the car I found out I had a flat. We ended up taking his car and then driving around for 3 hours looking for some place to eat. There was only two places we found open and they had over an hour wait, and were shitty buffet redneck restraunts. We ended up going to walmart and picking up something there. Friday morning I got the flat fixed, luckilly it was just a slow leak and there was nothing more than that and the flat only cost me $8 to fix.

And then today.

 Posted by at 10:35 pm